I came home yesterday afternoon and as I walked up the stairs I heard the classic splash of the turtles frantically freaking out and jumping from their sunning rock back into the water in attempt to burrow in the tiny rocks and hide in fear from the big humans. I laughed and went over to feed them a snack and call them "little pansies" or "scaredy cat-turtles" as I always do because they do the same nose dive routine every single time either Jordan or I step foot in the room. After I put down my groceries and went to give them a treat I noticed only ONE turtle. We have TWO-- Magic Man and Esther [who do you think named who?] I pulled out the floating sunning rock and looked around and still only found Magic Man, I mean-- it's not a very large tank, only 10 gallons, so Esther can't have actually found a hiding spot.
She had escaped.
AGAIN!
See, we came home from church on Sunday afternoon and were walking upstairs to change and get some lunch. Jordan went toward the bedroom to change and I, of course, went directly to the kitchen [yum!] Suddenly I hear Jordan call from the hallway, "Honey..? Come see this..." I look down the hallway and see Esther in the corner of the doorway to our bedroom-- a good 20 feet from her tank. She had escaped while we were gone and was out exploring for who knows how long!? Jordan and I were bewildered at how she had possibly managed to get out of the tank as the difference from the top of the rock to the top of the tank is taller than she is, but she must have used the heating lamp as a lift and then once up to the lip of the tank, just let herself free fall to the carpet below. All I could think was, 'Thank Heavens she didn't hurl herself down the stairs!'
So back to yesterday-- I get home from grocery shopping and notice she's missing. I do a good once over of the hallway and all attached bedrooms and when I don't find her I call Jordan to see if he has any thoughts on where she might be. He tells me to check under the fridge and oven because she loves dark cozy places. I search high and low... mostly low because I mean, come on- after all, she is just a tiny baby turtle and even though she has proven she is a master Houdini when it comes to escape-- how high could she really have gotten. I find a head flashlight [yes, like miners wear, we got them in our stockings this year from Jordan's parents. They have actually come in particularly handy on more than this occasion.] So I am crawling around the kitchen all commando-style-- 9 months pregnant, mind you. I don't see her under the fridge or oven, didn't get into the pantry under the door... I start to freak out because it's been at least 20 minutes of this search and rescue mission with zero results.
I break down and start crying [remember, I am 9 months pregnant and if I can't take care of a turtle, how can I be expected to take care of a human baby?] I get to my knees and pray that God will help me have a clear mind to think of where she could be and find her safely before she dries out and dies. I am sure I am overreacting about the dying part, but I don't know how long she's been missing since I can't be sure if she was even in the tank when I fed them in the morning because I didn't know I needed to be taking tabs. Crying only makes things worse because now I can't see anything through my tears.
I tell myself she'll be fine, that even if I can't find her before I have to leave for my appointment Jordan will find her when we get home. Telling myself things will be fine has never been an easy task-- as I am not very convincing. You really have to know me to know all the scenarios that were playing out in my head... She somehow managed to fling herself down two flights of stairs and is in the basement curled up under something awaiting her inevitable and ever impending death-- where would I go if I were a hurt turtle preparing to meet my maker? Or she's gotten INTO one of the pillows on the floor through the pillow case opening and is now suffocating to death and I'm like Liam Neeson on a strict time limit to find my turtle daughter before it's too late.
This is my mind. Ask Jordan. I really think these things can happen. I seriously checked the basement, I'm not kidding. Two separate flights of stairs and 3 levels below where her tank is. But if she got out of her tank-- there's no telling what she's capable of!
After about a half an hour of tearing the house apart, I throw in the towel and get ready for my doctors appointment. I called Jordan to let him know I've had no luck and we'd have to worry about her later. I'm on the phone with him -- when -- I hear scratching coming from somewhere near me...
"I've got to go, I'll call you back. I hear Esther!" and just hang up on him.
I am gently searching through all the pillows and blankets on the floor, again. See I knew I wasn't crazy! Nope not there.
"Esther?? Esther?? Make noise for mommy, where are you?"
I check the laundry baskets even though they were on top of the dresser and there is literally NO WAY, Houdini or not, that she could have gotten in there. Nope.
I hear a little more scratching and now I wont give up until I find her. It's coming from the dresser! But how? it is flush to the floor and I've searched behind it twice. Again with the tiny scratching of my baby attempting escape, but this time not so smart as her previous tank escapes. I figure she's gotten under it somehow. I have to carefully tilt it upward to see underneath and still don't see her, but I'm sure she's under there so I lift it completely on one side and THERE SHE IS in the very front corner!
*Sigh of relief.*
She looks fine, only a little dry on her bottom shell. When I plop her back into her tank she swims around with ease and looks un-phased.
I removed the sunning rock until I am able to readjust it so it's at a much lower level. I called Jordan to tell him of my triumphant rescue and say, "Magic Man ain't so magic. How did Esther escape twice and not him? I'm going to rename her Magic Woman!"
Jordan still insists Magic Man is deserving of his name because what if he actually had escaped along with Esther, but magically transported himself back into the tank when he heard me coming up the stairs? One way or the other-- at least one of our turtles is a magician and one of them is a jerk for abandoning the other either when Esther left the tank or when MM didn't transport her back with him!
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